78/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree: kota saree, choli: tunic! (#desividesi)

Story: I wrote a post,  it got deleted accidentally.  Re wrote the same post, hit delete text accidentally again

I believe in karma and Destiny.  I also believe in perseverance and hard work so one more try. Let's see what happens.

When the temperature meter turns from 30 degrees Fahrenheit to 70 degrees Fahrenheit the die hard Saree lover in me of course is awake and all charged up. Who could ever dare stop me from draping a Saree is what i thought as I was in shower getting ready to go to work. Nobody.
Kabali da, vandhuteynnu sollu!

Things to do in summer!!
1. Watermelon from roadside
2. Nungu or Taati munju
3. Rasna
4. Marina beach and manga,  sundal
5. Malli poo, jaaji for evening
6. Vadu manga and avakaya
7. Powercut and antakshari with mosquitoes in company
8. Water from earthern pot with vettiver smell
9. Birds chirping early at dawn
10. Aunties draped in crisp starched cotton sarees evening after shower

Of all the above I could just do one thing today! The aunty in Saree :)

As me and ma sip our filter coffee from davara and tumbler I hear old ilayaraja songs that I haven't heard in long time play in the background.  Ah childhood!

We have limited time in the galaxy,  we all have a chance to contribute to it's happiness. Why not do it now instead of waiting for the right time? Why not pick up the fone and say I love you to someone that we are uposet with? Why not gift mil a Saree and choli as surprise? Why not talk to friends like we did before? Why not accept that we are here only for a while? Why not today to spread more love? Why not us to start with it?

I understand that the brain thinks using neural and electric signals,  but do we feel really from our heart? Maybe the entire body and soul could feel.. maybe

Love all.

77/100 #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Ma in linen saree teamed with full kantha stitch blouse from BEAS. Me in chiffon floral teamed up with a crop top  (Will share Videsi look another time)

Story: Happyyyyy b-day to you, happy bday to you, happy birthday dear mamma,  happy bday to you! Clap clap clap. 👏👏👏🎂🍰🎉🎉🎉🎁

Its ma bday today, so I broke my rule and posting ma's pics to share the joy with you all. I made ma dress up and join my craziness going around looking for beauty to humbly picture amidst amazing backdrops. Ma's a true sport! At 46 degress Fahrenheit, extreme chilly wind, ma posed for pics because I love those moments. Such is love. Touchwood. Ma, the word means exactly that - forget self, love unconditional!

Growing up I figured out that I woulkd only marry a guy  that loves his mom to moon and back. "If a guy can't love his mom, how can I trust that I would be ever loved truly?!" That was and still is my point of view. Most moms, including Amma, and others I have seen, met, interacted or even distantly known or read about have sacrificed their lives, their happiness, their future for the sake of children. If one is ungrateful and forgetful to overlook that divine emotion, there is no way the person could respect any other emotion. Period. 😱😱 I don't buy the logic of comparison between mom, wife etc. The guy doesn't have to choose between two pure forms of love, those are complimentary and never a competition.  There is no role replacement with one other. Mom will always be mom and wife a wife! Once there is trust, confidence and all insecurities vanish, comes bliss, peace and simple for the family. The less we bring definitions of "-in-laws"  into our lives the better off we are.

Life is short, universe is huge, vast. One billion trillion events happen every nano second and we choose to worry about insecure emotions.. really?  Not worth it. Let our memories be the stars that twinkle subtly and not the meteors that  rush to crush.

Shout out to Deb saab, for the first best marriage gift - Ma.

76/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree

two decades old garden chiffon Saree, hand painted by ma.

Choli

Kantha stitch blouse.. my tailor added creativity and teamed it with purple brocade

Story

Phew! When I started my day I wasn't planning to wear a saree today .. however as the day unfolded and my story kept building I knew I had to share it with you all.

I was thinking in the morning about privilege our kids enjoy these days. Many of us that are able to afford smartphones,  fast internet and the like are also able to provide such a lifestyle to our kid's. It's called going with the flow. When we have a certain comfort it's not practical to expect them to know hardships only via imagination or hear-tell stories of our lives and not by their own experience...however I do believe they should go through that experience of "starting  from scratch" so they value our values as well. To know what it means to hold what's given and also let go when ithers are in need.

... later this evening I had to take public commute on way back from an office conference.. and my seat mate in train was smoking marijuana right there. It took me a while to realize but then it was disturbing. Privilege is one thing, responsibility is another. Rich or poor, young or old, east or west, freedom and privilege come with great responsibility.  Not a moment was I tempted,  neither was I influenced ... that act of addiction did not impact me.. mostly because I am stubborn! The good thing about being stubborn is no one can "make you do" anything unless you want to, bad thing is.. well... you are STUBBORN! I watched the mom with twin boys trying to keep them calm, the old lady lost in thought, the college kid with bicycle on board and many office goers like me .. each drowned in their own stories.. and of course my seat mate who was in a 'different world' altogether perhaps!

I talked to bettu about it. .. is the world half good or half evil .. how would you see it? He showed positive attitude .. and said good people outnumber. Touchwood.

One would hope the privileges enjoyed by our future generation is treated with responsibility and with stubbornness where needed. Time will tell.

75 #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Sari

yet another easy drape chiffon.

Choli

one of the one dozen silk sleeveless blouses ma got done for me  last year..

Ugadi subhakankshalu.. wishes on gudi padwa nav roz and other new year celebrations! May the new year bring you and your families bliss and peace

Festivals are joy.. Ugadi pachadi has always been my fav. It's exciting to taste something that is exactly like life. Sweet, sour, butter, hot and maybe even bland 😋..  I remember when amma would make Ugadi pachadi I would always wish and wait that no one else takes huge spoonful or mouthful so I can  sit and relish the whole thing 🤣🤣🤣  the bitter been never bothered me a bit!! Followed by boorulu and gaarelu. I made Ugadi pachadi today and went around asking everyone at home what was the first taste their buds felt.. it's exciting guess game. I am sure Amma would have missed me as she prepared pachadi today.. as she does. Yummy.

Ok there are fifty shades or grey or maybe few more.. I have witnessed them all in the clouds last few days. I can't complain about rain at all .. it's essential for life.. but missed the brightness and light as Sun would have showered during spring. When life gives you fifty or more shades of grey.. blow a kiss in the air and give it back hot pink saree, emerald green blouse and a gorgeous smile.. and btw. Dark grey and hot pink make a great combo don't you think??

That's exactly what I did today! Also.. Was listening to rudrashtakam.. and personally speaking I admire the Shiva Durga couple.. they are my role models.

It takes a secure strong confident man to let his better half own the power and rule the world.. not easy peasy. Also it takes a daring  caring woman of substance to accept a man who is not worldly wealthy but definitely the best for her and stands by her no matter what!. 

On that note I am not big fan of Lakshmi pressing her Lord's feet all day .. just saying.. 😒 it's their personal life so I can't interfere and get nosy about it. So reserving my thoughts to myself in due respect of their couple goals and privacy.

Anyways.. to all my power houses .. many many wishes as you celebrate special day today ..

Aur yeh gaana.. "chori hai, samajhke ladiyo.." .. "bas.. chori samajke na ladiyo..".. I am sure you are humming it now 💞💞💖💖

74/100 Nature and migration.. beauty and beasts

74/100 #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree: 

flock of birds from ByLoom amazing drape and width.

Choli: 

the amazing four way reversible blouse from Queen of Hearts by Deepa Mehta the blouse with zipper can be worn front , back, inside and out.. all four ways!!  💞💞💞💞 pure love marriage.100%

Story: 

hmmmm .. from time immemorial birds have migrated from one land (or water) to another. From time immemorial animals have migrated from one land (or water) to another. Man is a social animal.... I wonder when man wasn't as civilized as today,  what motivated her from migrating like fellow animals.. what were those pastures she sought? Animals migration was Nature's plan and play, when man became self aware what and who empowered her to migrate and make something his own?

And when he did listening to his mind, as do many (im)migrations today..where does his heart belong?

Heart and love thrive in liberation. On the same scale of love, if you choose to 'hold' something in your possession .. it might lead to suffocation.  While on the same scale of love if you choose to 'allow' love to bloom.. it still is yours but thrives in bloom. It's just how you prefer  to   express love! If it were a flower, some like to hold, touch, squeeze not knowing it might brush the poor being.. While some others admire and let it be. Some posses, some liberate. I say this because one cannot force to love something nor can one deny.

The heart can always hold and share  more love than one can ever imagine, it stretches itself but never runs out! When it migrates it carries a piece of every journey as it moves only enriching by the way.. never diminishing in experience or excitement.

Isi baat pe.. a dedication to nature and its nomads.. yeh gaana.. "musafir hoon yaaron.. na ghar hai.. na tikaana..  "

It was my long time wish to be in same frame as Nature and it's beauty .. lucky day today!

73/100 #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree

ByLoom Handloom Dhonekali.

Choli

my last minute jackpot from Arpita Saha. The courier reached the day of ma's travel 💃💃💃. Neckpiece from Aditi Chakraborty

Story 

My moment of introspection. What brought the difference in me? Many days and years I had woken up from sleep not feeling beautiful. Feeling that I had to be someone else. Feeling that I should like someone else. It was tiring because I could not find exact shell that I wanted to live in!

The search went on for a while, me rejecting the inner core of those beautiful outer shells and beginning to appreciate the innet beauty slowly and steadily. Something dawned. Ola! I was not really stuck in a terrible shell after all. The shell is for me to paint and picture.
The shell is what "I choose" to show the world, but the core is what "I truly am". So I started embracing my shell and feeling comfortable in it.

Soon, I woke up feeling beautiful. The shell did not matter anymore but my heart was filled with smile. The comfort of being I.Me.Myself. I realized I did not have to do any extra effort to be myself, that saves a lot of time you see !! That's the beauty .. no money, time or extra efforts involved. You don't need to get your lessons from anyone for being them, instead you study yourself and learn from your own mistakes becoming a better person n-one mistake at a time.

I have erred, I have hurt, I have realized I am human. I learn. I grow.

That's detoxification of self. The more we purify our thoughts, feelings, the more beautiful we wake up. I am still on my detox journey, but believe me.. it's working and it helps!

72/100 #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree

Ma's twenty five year old narayanpeta silk saree.

Choli

multi check Handloom cotton

Story

this saree is a story in itself. Ma purchased this for Durga puja more than two decades ago. She has worn it on several occasions as one could tell.  Sarees are like humans.. the wrinkles, the soft saggy skin, the delicate aging, the memories collected through years.... it's exactly same. Ditto. As I was draping the Saree I could hear it whisper to me.. many auspicious moments it was part of, the saree knew more than me. The saree was part of happiness,  pious religious events..  the soft pleats, the easy pallu, the unstarched drape. I immediately felt a sense of respect for the weave, for the weaver and for time.

I always wished that next birth I should be a fruit tree, drinking just water but giving fruit and shade in return. Now I am reconsidering.. maybe I want to be a Saree. Woven with love. Worn with love. Treasured with love...

My ammamma's sarees were similar too. Unstarched,  soft, wise and silently commanding a sense of aura and respect,  just like her.

This combo was always a sure shot yes for many biyeh-bari, pellivaru illu, kalyana veedu.. I could imagine at least couple of these in any occasion.. such is it's glamour and grace.

71/100 #debsaristories #100sareepact

Saree

cool kota from @antara, Choli from @Umbara designs

Story

my first @Umbara flaunt... milestone..💖💞.

These days mist of the buying experience is online engaging with very dedicated, knowledgeable and enrhusiatic women that love what they do..   Shweta pings me midnight to say custom blouse I requested did not cost as much (and I misunderstood that I owe her) and when clarified Shwetha suggested she could send me a kota cotton saree instead if I like! Of course I do! I was humbled that Shweta even cared to be honest, I could not way have figured out what would have costed how much! Its like walking the talk.. "do the right thing even when nobody is watching".

I let Shweta decide any saree for me just mentioning white is fav color. Shweta.. your choice is beautiful. I love this saree.. beautiful.  Thank you thank you.

this blouse is a feather! I couldn't wait any longer!!! Amidst all the selling buying challenges such sweet gestures like Shweta keeps the group going, that's our spirit. 💃💃💃💃

The beautiful stole.. was hand woven by hubby paternal grandma .. thamma.. with lots of love fir her daughter in law.. Ma. I love heirloom and i treasure it. It speaks stories, memories and stands for relationships and test of time. Never met you, but love u thama.

70/100 #debsaristories #100sareepact

Saree

Bestest Begumpuri from @BEAS

Choli

matching with saree.

Story

Ma baba arrived. It already made me humble.
Opened my suitcase of treasure and overwhelmed by the amount of love received..
I kept feeling the fabrics again and again.. recalled all online conversations,  all pampering helping me choose what I would look good in.. even better than what I would have chosen for myself ever..

It's women day and who said women don't get along? Breaking all myths... is the suitcase of love I received today. Strangers can be friends, love has no boundaries.. life is full of surprises..

I don't think I am worthy of such love, but because you chose to grace it on me, I accept it humbly. Will stay so.

Happy women's day to us! 💃💃

69/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories #100sareepact

Saree: fall back.. Feel good..black cotton ikat saree. Choli: white crop too (twin of the black crop top from the snow day)

Story:
"ma, what does this mean?" Asks bettu.. showing his middle finger.
I take it slow, non reactive. "Hmm, who showed you this?"
Bettu: "at school.. but tell me what it means. Is it bad?"
Me: "it's the same as the F word" (he knows F word is bad, not in detail why though.. but enough to keep away from trouble)

Bettu: "if that finger is bad, why did God give it at all, he could have just given us four fingers. Duh!"
Ma: God never designed anything bad in nature. It's human's interpretations that make something good or bad. All fingers and toes and everything on earth have a purpose... so don't mistreat them

Bettu: "ma what is gay?"
Ma: "actually not what, but who.. a boy that grows up and chooses to have boyfriend and not girlfriend,  you may refer as gay. It's their personal preference.. and you should always respect those.."

Bettu: "ma, what does F word actually mean. I mean what is it?
Ma: "hmm.... can we talk about this later.... ?"
Bettu: "no, I want to know"
Ma: "ok. Let me collect the right information and share with you tomorrow. Ok? "

My answer is due today. I want to provide answer enough for bettu to feel he understood what it is and why it is misused misquoted etc. But not to also overdo beyond his need at age. It's like carefully peeling layers of the onion.. talk of tests of motherhood!

My answer is somewhat like this. There are always good and bad to everything in world. Anything in moderation done with respect,  thoughtfulness and in good intent always wins over what is done in bad taste, ill intent and without any concern or commitment.

F word is a loose and misinterpretation of love and creation or birth, making babies .

Like sugar, salt and everything in life, moderation always is needed. Such is love or making love, making babies. When it is done with love trust and respect it stays as love. But when someone does it out of their mind and just for fun it's loosely used as the F word ...

-------------
Edited after my conversation with bettu:
I said, why would you use this as cuss word and say to someone  "hey I want to make babies with you!". Making babies is a beautiful thing and adults take time to choose the right partner, make friends with them, decide to get married, marry, prepare for family, earn, save and decide to have babies..  It's long and beautiful journey.
Bettu: "Yikes! That doesn't make sense!!"
Me: in my mind, glad point made. "Bettu, do you have any other questions or are you good?"

Bettu: "ma what is bitch?"
Ma: it's a female dog. Liness-lioness, bull-cow, dog-bitch etc etc.
Bettu: "why is that a cuss word.. why is female dog a cuss word?"
Ma: "exactly my question too!!! That actually doesn't make sense.. but somehow it is widely misused and misinterpreted.. and ended up as a cuss word. At least now you know what it means, but not everyone know so  refrain from using it else people will misunderstand you!"

Bettu: moving on.. "ma, just one question, why are the shoes for dance recitals always black, why not white..."
Me... 😊😊😊 bettu is convinced, ma passed. Kids will be kids.
-------------

Bettu and I always have open communications. We talk and share a lot and I would not change it one bit. I don't believe in taboo talks at home especially between kid and parents. I would rather (and happy) he gets it from me/us .. and not Google for everything.

I will see how that goes...  picture abhi baaki hai bhai

Gaana? Blank as of now.. it will come to.me soon..

68/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories #iworkedout #100sareepact

Saree: faux georgette perhaps.. choli: net Crop Top

Story. Ok.. I can't believe still. It did happen. Ok. Ok. Breathe. Calm.. It SNOWED!!! right at home. I am yelling inside. It's crazy excitement.  It's like snow in Chennai or Hyderabad.   One of those impossible unexpected things that you won't imagine even in dreams. Oh my god. (People who live in areas where this is common pls pls ignore my excitement!! Today I am more kiddish than my kid.. I was jumping in joy and clapping literally)

❤❤❤ It snowed just in two miles radius.. that's it. Just That! Doesn't it make you feel special?? In a place that it not expecting snow.. and then u suddenly see this beautiful sight for some time.. it's like a dream. Came and vanished. Left a memory. ❤❤❤

Guess what ? Immediately I ran upstairs pulled a Saree and some choli and thankfully because I am fast in tying Saree was done in two mins, ten secs for lipstick,  thirty secs to fix my tripod abd out I ran.. into the snow or rain or whatever that beautiful thing wants to call itself. I took pics from front yard also for the first time for this group.. couple of neighbors gave me that look.. as if .. is she really ok or what? But who cares! Memory had to be made. This moment had to be remembered which I will anyways but I wanted it my way.. my Saree way.

I woke up ma baba and showed them live on watsapp video. I dint want to scare Amma nanna  Siri with midnight call so recorded and sent them video.. I want every One to be with me to enjoy the moment.

I am still smiling..i even called my hubby and asked him to pickup son from his math class (very unusual of me saying this.. unusual like the snow event that just happened ) but then.. I wanted all of us to enjoy it together.  We laughed we went out and collected tiny pieces of ice in zip lock and preserved it in freezer for keeps. And now we even are playing Christmas carols.. Let it snow let it snow.. enjoying with a cup of hot chocolate.

And now.. I am sharing my craziness with you all too..

Such is life with me. Totally crazy, totally life.

Isi baat pe chalo yeh gaana ho jaaye.. "aaj rapat jaaye to hume na uthayyo.."
#Macys

67/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories  #100sareepact

Saree: benarasi.. not Georgette, not cotton or synthetic either.. donno.. choli: one of my early readymade ones back from four five years ago

Holi wishes to all my friends.. may life be as colorful as our cholis..

Story: I feel drained. I feel quiet. I feel lots processing within needing me to maintain calm. I really wanted to step out and get some moonlight in the pic but believe me the weather outside is crazy windy, chilly and damp with moisture.. so dint take risk.

I had setup tripod to take pics and received an office call.. nevertheless the pic was clicked !!!

Isn't it annual day time almost at schools now? So much fun right? Siri as a kid got lot more stage time than I did... I remember taking bournvita and marie biscuits to her .. while she sat there in a bench.. carefully not to let her lip lids (is thr such a word?)  touch each other... Else the bright red lipstick would vanish... she would drink the mil carefully or I or amma would help her.. biscuits too.. no touching lips.. that itself was quite a task... the pink or sometimes white frilled frock, ribbons, some shiny powder on face.. wow.. cuties. The rehearsals, practice time during class (such an important feeling! Being called out for practice) .. to be seated with some other amazing performers or at least that's what the young mind could think in awe... the back stage conversations..

And if you had to collect prizes during annual day.. that's even better...walking up stage in costume when your name is called one or more times.. shows who the real star kid is... ahh this moments.. phir na aayenge woh bachpan ke din..

So every time I try to worry about kid and what his future holds I also tell myself universe is big and kind to have small place for all abd each of us.. so let him b e for now and have fun.. because before he realizes his own childhood will vanish and I don't want to be th reason for it gone sooner .. especially when I am reliving my own through his..

Kho na jaayiye.. taare zameen par...

Isi baat pe ek gaana ho jaye? The eternal bollywood holi anthem..  rang barse... from the one and only Amitabh Bachchan saab.

52/100 #100CholiCraze #debsaristories #iworkedout

Saree: georgette with heavy border, Choli: matching piece that came with saree. Friday finally and I am in bling bling mood. You may notice that bling bling in one of the pics. Crazy me, never tried this ever!! 🤣🤣

Story: this Saree was when Ma took me along to purchase sarees that she would gift me during wedding.. on a nice pre winter evening ma and I went to Sadar bazaar Gurgaon, the slim lanes bustling with activity, ras malai, jalebi, samosa aroma engulfing the entire surroundings.. on the street corners. You need to cut the crowd either in rickshaw or walk. Once in the shop ma was busy picking the best of their collection. she chose this saree and said you will look gorgeous in this.. coming from chennai I wasn't accustomed to such work sarees ( it's usually silk or cotton) but I am happy with any and all sarees and this one definitely looked gorgeous..! The shopkeeper was amused of her choices and said, apki beti ki shaadi kab hai? she said: yeh meri honewali bahu hai aur beti bhi. that man was stunned because our (ma and i)  conversations are very lively and open, he could not guess any more..

Sadar bazaar shopping was always fun, my first razai shopping with friends for first delhi winter ... was from here. It was big deal to figure out the right razai (and later we figured it still wouldn't help so we would used hot iron to warm up bed and snuggle into it)

The blouse is bit loose, it was stitched during my wedding and it is one of those normal styled ones.. nothing fancy. I didn't bother to alter it anyways.. some things should be left as is..